Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Ink and Sock Tops

As I have mentioned before, Father is the kind of guy who likes to be in charge of things. Whether it be my plans on a Tuesday night, or what color Mother decides to paint her nails, he enjoys being a part of the decision. So you can imagine how upset he was when I came home with a brand new tattoo five months before my eighteenth birthday.

Ok, so in retrospect, I should have at least talked to my parents before getting it, if not waiting until I turned eighteen, but also in retrospect, I do not regret getting it for one second. (if you know me personally, you know the story behind why I do not regret it. If you do not, and REALLY want to know, then feel free to send me an email at lifealmostfactual@gmail.com and I will write you an answer. I don't feel it is the right setting to address such a serious matter in the main body of a post)
Look! It's my tat! If you don't know what it is, it's too hard to
try and explain...

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

All Hail Chairman Mao

So I was going to write this awesome post about The Game of Mao, but then I realized that would be considered discussing rules...And I don't want a whole bunch of extra cards...So instead, this is what you get...

End P of O

Monday, May 7, 2012

I Hate Applebee's (part1)

Up until I typed the name for this post, I thought Applebee's was spelt Applebea's. So there is a start to show you how much I dislike this place. I decided that I would start with the most intense of the reasons for my strong dislike of Applebee's instead of going chronologically because I can. (oh, and part of this post is rather serious, so if you don't want to read it, then click here to laugh at my clumsiness)

A few years ago, I met a girl at a summer camp. We didn't talk to each other more than twice at this camp and I think only one of those times were an actual conversation. (sounds like the start to a great friendship doesn't it?) Even though we barely talked to each other at all during the camp experience, I ended up getting her contact information. Mainly because it was polite and everybody was swapping digits.

This picture has NOTHING to do with this post,  however,
I found it and its hilarious because French is falling out of bed
so I stole it and here it is...

Saturday, May 5, 2012

This Post is Morbid

So, I'm not saying that I do this type of thing all the time. In fact, I have only done this once. And only tried to do it again once since then. But we will get there in a minute. This all started because of Moss though. Like seriously, I promise it's all her fault. If her family didn't own a funeral home then none of this would have ever happened...

Friday, May 4, 2012

Toothbrush Diaries

I will be honest with you, when I first thought of this idea for a post, I thought it was the best idea ever...but now, I'm not so sure. I mean if a freakin bird is flying through a library, then a post about how much I love my toothbrushes just doesn't seem to compare. But, I promised you a post about toothbrushes, so here it is.
Say "hello" to my beautiful, orange toothbrush!
Sometimes I find myself having very strong feelings for inanimate objects. Ok, very strong feelings is a bit of an understatement. I almost would go as far as saying I fall in love with them on occasion... I can't help it though! I don't know why it is, it just happens. Part of me thinks it may have something to do with the fact that I don't have a pet. (Mother if you are reading this, that is code for you should totally buy a dog for whenever I am home...or a wallaby)

Thursday, May 3, 2012

AHHHH!!!!! EXCITEMENT!

So I have a really amazing post that I plan on writing very soon about a toothbrush love affair. In fact I had planned on writing it yesterday until something crazy happened. And that is what I am about to tell you all about. But just know, the toothbrush will come soon!

Yesterday I had the privilege of tutoring a very nice guy in the subject of math. He is a fourth grader and is having a little trouble memorizing the divisibility rules. As we were going over the divisibility rule for 9's, (add the digits in the number and if the sum is divisible by 9 then the original number will be divisible by 9) I heard a flutter and something went right over my head. I looked up, and nothing was there. (now I realize that this makes sense because I felt it zoom over my head so of course it would be gone by the time I looked up)

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Martin Fierro Is a Rather Nice Guy

Have you ever found yourself in a really uncomfortable situation? Like walking into a really fancy restaurant dressed in a tee shirt and not having enough cash to pay for an appetizer? I have. In fact, some would say I have found myself in that exact situation.

A while ago, my friend Shorts and her long-time boyfriend broke up. She went through a slight phase where she was slightly depressed. This could not last. If you know Shorts at all, she is very peppy, very giddy, and just an all around fun girl. So when she is upset, it is not fun.
Shorts and I. This time we decided to eat inside our budget and chose BK...
And my lips look retarded...Crap. That's offensive isn't it? Let's try that again:
And my lips look retarded. (does drawing a line through it make it appropriate?)